Confidence is the key to a happy, successful life. We all know someone that is truly confident in their own skin-- not someone arrogant, but someone who genuinely loves their life and all the people in it. They’re almost intoxicating. That’s the power of confidence.
Having more confidence in yourself bleeds over into every aspect of your life, including your relationships. The more confident you are in yourself, the better your romantic (and platonic) relationships will become.
Self Worth = Higher Standards
That’s a good thing. When you know what you are worth and are fully comfortable with the person you are, you suddenly open yourself up to options. Understanding that you are valuable and worth taking a chance on, you start looking for relationships that meet those standards.
Insecurities Breed Negative Qualities
A lot of bad habits and actions, especially in romantic relationships, are caused by insecurity and a lack of confidence in yourself. Taking everything defensively, getting unnecessarily jealous, constantly worrying, refusing to be vulnerable… all of these things can stem from insecurities.
Confidence Is Infectious
Not only will other aspects of your life improve, but so will the confidence of the people you interact with. Being truly confident leads to being a happier person. In the famous words of Elle Woods:
Not only do happy people not shoot their husbands (a VERY good side effect of happiness), but they also make other people happy. Smiles and laughter are infectious. So are compliments. Start spreading the love, and suddenly you’ll start to realize that your partner is returning the favor.
You Deserve To Love Yourself
Whether you realize your worth or not, you have it. You are strong and powerful and full of potential. You deserve all the perks that come with self-confidence: more smiles and laughter, better relationships, more happiness, better sex… the whole 9 yards.
But How Do You Get More Confidence?
Contrary to what the first page of Google articles on the subject might tell you, you don’t just decide one day to be more confident, then wake up the next day feeling like Beyoncé (unless, of course, you are Beyoncé). It isn’t a magical button that you can press to instantly transform your entire thought process.
You have to teach yourself to be more confident. It takes time and patience and a lot of trial and error. You’ll embarrass yourself and make mistakes and have relapses. It’s a process, but the end result is worth it. So how do you start the process?
1. Get Some Courage
Confidence isn’t a decision you make, but courage is. Identify your comfort zone, and then take baby steps outside of it. Smile at someone when you walk past them. Tell that woman in your spin class that you adore her leggings. Tell your partner what you want when you’re having sex. Say yes to something you normally wouldn’t. Don’t pretend to be indecisive about where you want to go on date night. Make decisions. Be bold. Take risks.
We aren’t saying it’ll be easy or that it’ll never blow up in your face, but pushing past your comfort zone just a little bit more every day will help you start establishing a skill of self-assurance. Even embarrassments and failures help. Once you feel that embarrassment of something firing back, and then once you move past it, you’ll start to realize that mistakes or embarrassments don’t define who you are or what others think of you.
2. Get Comfortable In Your Body
You only get one body, so you might as well make the most of it. Find you a pair of absolutely perfect jeans-- the ones that make your butt look like it’s on fire. Buy the pushup that makes your boobs look heavenly. Surprise your partner with a new set of seductive lingerie. Suggest going on a shopping trip for some adult toys to spice it up in the bedroom.
Do things that make you feel sexy and exhilarated. Worried about getting the right size? We offer private fittings so you can be sure it’s a perfect fit!
3. Download Our Ultimate Lingerie Guide
Part of feeling comfortable in your own skin is feeling like you really do look gorgeous. Our Ultimate Lingerie Guide will walk you through what lingerie styles will look best on you based on your body type. Still have questions? That’s what we’re here for! Come see one of our team members at one of our five Arkansas locations. We want to make sure you find something that you love!
4. Set Goals And Improve Yourself
Feeling accomplished is part of being confident. Get productive with goals on how you can improve. Maybe you’ve been dying to learn a new skill. Sign up to take a class. Maybe you’ve been wanting a new job. Start looking in your spare time! Maybe you’ve wanted to get in shape for a 5K race coming up soon. Download the Couch to 5K app and start a routine. Setting goals and then reaching them gives you such a boost of confidence.
5. Be Kind To Yourself
This means not frowning at your cellulite in the mirror (it’s normal and nothing to be ashamed of). This means not beating yourself up because you didn’t make it to the gym this morning. It’s eating healthier and doing things that make you happy and treating yourself just a little bit.
Teaching yourself to feel comfortable in your own skin is a skill and a process. You have to start somewhere.
Have questions about how you can be more confident in your own skin, or just need something seductive that looks amazing on you? Come see us! Seductions Lingerie is so much more than your typical adult store. Our goal is to help you improve your sex life and your relationships in whatever ways we can!